LIVING DEAD
ani
Cherries dipped in blood
A man’s flesh in your waiting hands
Praying to a devil who condemned you
Living out death
Another life another night will it ever be enough
Singing songs of endless devotion
But years will let you see
The gaping wound it still sore and open
Forever dripping with the lives lived and seen
RUN RABBIT
ani
I: I feel like Alice following her white rabbit. I know you can’t be good for me- do you even know me? But rabbit’s not the one checking their watch this time, it’s me and I’m running out of time. How long will it take for you to notice me behind you- in my blue dress and tears on my face. Blonde hair in the wind but it’s damaged from the bleach, black shoes shining but they’re digging into my feet with each step. There’ll be no tapping my heels three times. Each time you turn your head I wonder if you’ll stick around to chat, give me a chance to catch my breath. You never do. So, I follow you, through the dirt and flowers and music and madness. I follow you until I can’t tell if I planted the flowers, until I can’t tell if the madness is yours or mine. I follow you like Alice with her white rabbit. But they came to a stop. Will you ever give me a chance to rest? Please give me a chance to rest. Or I’ll have to beg, baby, and I don’t think I can do that.
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II: Alice didn’t eat the cake and Dorothy didn’t meet the lion. My pocket watch stopped and I’m home- sort of- but it looks more like wonderland every day. And you’re not here. Leading someone else down to the tea party. But that’s okay, I made peace with the rabbit’s hole and once in a while I’ll lay flowers for our graves. The blue dress shrunk in the wash, and I dyed my hair again. You wouldn’t recognise me anymore- and that’s okay.
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III: I’ve found a new rabbit. She took me by the hand before she started running.
My name is Ani (she/they) and I’m a writer and artist from the UK, my submissions for this issue are titled ‘Living Dead’ and ‘Run Rabbit’. One of these pieces is a short poem and the other flash fiction. Although I am inspired by everything from what I read (currently Pandora’s Jar by Natalie Haynes) to the music I listen to (currently PJ Harvey) to where I am, I tend to write about my life, making my work, like many artists, highly personal. I love to experiment with my work, by any means and I am also inspired by writers like Mariana Enriquez, Dakota Warren and Savannah Brown. My greatest aim is to simply create.
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Instagram: @anisramblings